02 January 2011
Post 281: Murder Out of Wedlock
So another interesting thing about Miss Ladd, star of stage and screen, is her promiscuous lifestyle. She has had five ex-husbands and numerous lovers. I found it interesting that Pentecost, Quist, and the other characters in the book still seemed to treat her with a great deal of respect as a professional and as a person. This is in high contrast to the typical way I have seen women in this genre during this particular age of writing being treated (this was written in 1983).
I thought one of the most interesting exchanges that happened in this book was between Quist and Ladd when she explains to him that she did truly love her husband(s), but could not prevent herself from falling to the temptations of other sexual encounters when her preferred partner was not around. Quist's response is a fairly reasonable, "Let's just say that I believe that, but I don't quite understand it." Page 113. I say that this is reasonable, because there are people who are more inclined towards monogamy than others. For whatever biological, social, or moral reason some people cannot and will not cheat on their spouses. There are others, however, that for whatever reason are drawn to a wide variety of sexual experiences or partners, and then a third group that might not stray from a healthy relationship, but who are more inclined to do so when that relationship is faltering or otherwise not fulfilling needs.
I admit, I belong more to the third group, with a slight leaning to the second. You see, I enjoy a variety of sexual experiences and having sex with one person is going to be vastly different from having sex with another. I have even found that certain kinks I enjoyed with one person don't necessarily translate well to everyone or anyone else. Do I need these additional experiences enough to jeopardize my relationship with my fiance? Definitely not, but I might be more willing to consider their benefits if I felt my relationship was already in jeopardy. There have been times when I have made my fiance aware of sexual or romantic feelings I've had towards other people, not because I love him any less, but because I love and respect him and myself enough not to deny that I have those feelings from time to time. And I feel that by letting my fiance know these things we are able to strengthen our relationship in such a way that I do not need dalliances to satisfy me, even though we are currently separated and it would be easy enough to do so.
As it is, I am able to enjoy what little time I do get to spend with the person I love the most. And I get to do so without fear of losing him to another woman or shame because I sometimes find myself attracted to other men. Instead, we are able to acknowledge that we have those feelings, and occasionally we even laugh at them and remark at how little fun we would have in those alternate relationships compared to what we have now. I can hardly imagine myself in this situation with anyone else and enjoying myself as much as I am. Despite being in a hard place right now, I'm still managing to keep my head dry mostly, and I don't think I could do that without Danny.
My short review can be found on Goodreads, there just wasn't much to say about this rather unremarkable book.
LibsNote: I won this book from Forgotten Bookmarks, which is not directly affiliated with publishers, authors, etc. of the material I am reviewing.