Day 111: Rise and Shine

Rise and Shine by Anna Quindlen.  ISBN: 9780375502248.

Quindlen seems to have a major hard-on for New York.  Fair enough, and to go along with my previous post, her characters don't like it when other people question their lifestyle choice to live in New York.  I will admit, I've committed the cardinal sin of asking a Native New Yorker why they lived there.

On one level, I can certainly understand wanting to be live in a major cultural center of the world.  It would be amazing to be able to pop into the Natural History Museum or the Museum of Modern Art.  I would love to be able to eat Ethiopian one night and Algerian the next.  And while I'm not big into music, I could very much dig going to a small coffee house to listen to some jazz or folk music every once in awhile.

But I don't like the idea of living so close to such a large number of people.  You know what they do in New York to get some privacy?  They ignore each other.  You can typically spot the tourists, because they are the ones that make eye contact.  I'm just not sure I'm cut out for that kind of lifestyle, the constant hurrying and frantic work that is require to maintain a 500 square foot two bedroom that barely has a kitchen and where the term "water closet" has never been so apt.

I like space.  I don't necessarily need a lot of it, but I definitely need more than the typical big city can provide.  I don't really need three dozen ethnic restaurants within a ten mile radius.  Would it be nice?  Hell yeah, but I'm okay with making a special trip across to another town for really good Indian food in order to have some peace and quiet in my life.  It's not that I couldn't survive somewhere like New York City, because I think I would adjust, I just don't have the drive to actually make that happen.  I certainly respect the people who do make it work though.

Day 110: Rise and Shine

Rise and Shine by Anna Quindlen.  ISBN: 9780375502248.

There's a conversation in this book that I've had with countless numbers of people, mostly family.  It basically goes like this:

"I'm not having kids."
"You'll change your mind."

You know what, fuck that.  It doesn't matter if I'll change my mind in the future, at the moment, I. Do. Not. Want. Kids.  Why not just take that at face value?  If you wonder why teenagers get so pissed off, it might be because you don't take them seriously.  I've had these feelings since I was about 12; that is over thirteen years that I've stuck with a decision.  That's longer than most people like their tattoos. 

Let's just pretend for a moment you really like doing things to your body that other people think are crazy, or you don't do things to your body that people think you should do.  It's still your body and those people have no right to make comments about what you should and should not do.  The only exception might be a doctor or other health professional, but even when it comes down to that you still have the right to fuck up your own body if you damn well please.  When it comes down to it, deciding to have or not have children is still a decision about what to do with your body.

People seem to forget that.  It's not just a decision about lifestyle, but also about my body and my health.  Children are great, I'm not denying that.  I love my nephew, but I am a greedy, greedy person and I love my sleep.  I am in no way prepared to deal with the little hellion that is likely to spring from my loins should I become pregnant.  And please don't give me the whole, "No one is prepared speech."  I've heard that one too.  I don't think people realize exactly how tiresome the whole conversation is.  So if you happen to be one of those people who condescends someone's decision not to produce children, please just bite your tongue and be thankful it's one less potential being to take up resources.