14 May 2010

Day 48: The Mermaid Chair

The Mermaid Chair by Susan Monk Kidd.  ISBN: 9780143057420 (audiobook).

I have so many issues with this book I don't know where to begin.  Jessie is such a weak character it's easier to be irritated by her than sympathetic to her plight.  Oh no, you're in a perfect, but unsatisfying marriage with a great daughter and comfortable living.  Then she goes on to complain and whine about how she might lose both her husband and her lover.

Oh. My. God.  If you are that dissatisfied with your current life, would it not still be better than maintaining the status quo?  Are you honestly that defined by the men in your life that you can't be without one?  Ever.  I mean, she's honestly got some serious daddy issues (I'm not making assumptions here, it's mentioned in the story).  I just find it hard to believe that there are women out there who are that insecure in themselves that they can't stand on their own.  That there are women who feel they must be married or attached at any cost.

What kind of man wants that kind of woman?  That whole mythical bullshit about finding someone to complete you has done more damage than I think any of us can even imagine.  How many people out there have wandered around just waiting for that someone to come and make them a better person?  If you are one of those people, stop now.  I've been one of those people who dates and dates and dates, partially out of boredom, partially because I knew I needed the practice of dating a lot of people.  I spent so much time with people I didn't like.  

I actually got to the point where I was prepared to live alone for the rest of my life.  Danny and I actually started dating because I wanted to give him the benefit of my dating expertise.   I enjoyed our conversations and companionship so much that I continued to date him.  If anything ever happened to Danny, I would be sad, but I would be okay.  Please, please, please just learn to live on your own and find satisfaction with yourself.  If you can't, you will one day find yourself completely alone, no matter how many people you have around you.

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